Stock Market blues

Every Thursday afternoon I have a masseur who comes to give my body a work over, presumably to make me fit enough to show-off my imaginary six abs. While he is pummeling my body he also taps me for information on the stock-market. I have no clue how he imagines that I am his ticket to quick wealth.

Thanks to reading financial dailies and magazines, and of course watching the television channels I have gained some knowledge of how the bourses work. But, it is still a mystery to me how one goes about making a fortune there. Initially, I presumed that all one needed to do was follow the tips given by the so called experts and then laugh all the way to the bank.

A couple of years back one worthy suggested that I buy sugar companies stocks as the government was going to make compulsory the blending of ethanol with fuel. No fool would have ignored such good advice so I put in a good chunk of my money in some well-known sugar units. My investment has become rather anaemic since then, as later it was found that ethanol content may affect some rubber components in the motor vehicle. Similarly with steel, ports, FMCG, financial services. Whichever stock I was recommended to buy by the experts seem to wait for my cheque to be encashed before they started the downward journey.

But one thing I have failed to understand is how one day the stock market zooms to a stratospheric level because of the situation in the European Union and the next day it goes in to a free fall for just the same reason. On Monday the stock prices of banks shoot up as business sentiment is good and Tuesday they crash as the situation in Greece is a bit dodgy. Why on earth should the poor investor sitting in Channapatna be affected by the financial shenanigans in Athens is a real mystery.

Some years ago I was closely involved with the listings of my company and its subsidiary on NASDAQ and the New York Stock Exchange. An Initial Public Offering is all about glamour. The listing company is to be exhibited as a successful one so we all stayed in one of the best hotels in New York. On the morning of the listing we all trooped to the bourse in shiny black limousines. NASDAQ is more automated like our NSE but in NYSE there is a lot of showmanship on display. There is a ceremonial breakfast with the head of the exchange and then the traditional bell ringing and cap throwing ceremony. A lot of bonhomie is on display which becomes euphoric when the stock opens at a higher price. But when they study the balance sheet the poor investors will be left scratching their heads at the cost they have borne for the public issue.

Now coming back to my masseur, I somehow escape any physical damage by giving him vague suggestions and telling him that the time was not yet right to invest.